an oil cross

I looked at the mirror with a sense of tiredness and peace, and saw a forehead, shiny from an oil cross.

I grew up in a church that taught that when the Bible talks about praying for healing or miracles, it meant only spiritual miracles, not physical ones. For instance the verse, "Is any one of you sick? He should call the elders of the church to pray over him and anoint him with oil in the name of the Lord." - (James 5:13-15), was taught that "sickness" meant having sinned, not actually being sick.

This kind of teaching helped calm the confused mind of a developing teenager. You see, I am a practical guy, I like to have answers to fix things, and for everything to make sense (avoiding all cognitive dissonance if you will). I saw a number of people prayed for over the ears, and there was two main camps the "If its your will camp" and the "we have faith, Lord you must" camp. I was never comfortable "demanding" (as I saw it) anything of God. But it seemed silly to pray for God's "will" when there seems to be so many verses telling us to "ask and you will receive", His will seems clear. So it made it easy for me to ignore healing entirely, categorize it as a "spiritual sickness or sin issue" and call it good.

That is until recently. I have been sick.

Ashley and I went to Costa Rica this holiday for a family wedding. While there I caught something nasty that gave me a fever for a few days. It was pretty scary; I haven't felt like that in all I can remember. Also the day Ashley and I left we caught something else which gave us explosive diarrhea (sorry tmi) for 10 days, again scary.

We didn't know what to do, should we wait it out, and go on with life, or see a doctor? The diarrhea was coming in waves, so sometimes we felt "ok", other times awful. We decided to wait it out, and continue with life, which meant taking teenagers to Iowa for a conference. Needless to say we didn't feel better, and two days into the conference, we had the same explosive symptoms. This was getting scary, not only had this been many days, be we weren't able to keep anything in. Both Ashley and I were losing weight at an alarming level. We decided that we had to go home and see a docter, otherwise it may have been another 3-4 days before we could get an appointment (due to New Years)

So we decided to approach my supervisor and pastor, with all of our reasons to go home. He listened carefully, and than said, "We need to pray". I hate this response. My problem fixing practical brain screams, "No, I need a doctor", but who can say that? So our pastor gathered a number of people together and we did as the verse says, he anointed our heads with oil and prayed for our healing. He then encouraged us to go home, he said that praying in faith and doing our part were not mutually exclusive; that seeing a doctor didn't take away our faith for God is the ultimate healer.

As I stood in the mirror in my room, looking at my shiny forehead, an overwhelming sense of peace came over me. Not just an emotional peace, but a physical peace. I knew that God was healing me. We did go to the doctor who gave us antibiotics, which we needed, but we didn't have anymore symptoms after that night. May seem like a coincidence, but to me, it was a little miracle.

When Jesus came proclaiming the "good news" or "gospel" of the Kingdom, he talked about it as a present realty that had come but was not here in its fullness. It is a place of justice and peace, where captives or released, poor are cared for, oppressed are released and sick are healed. (Luke 4:18) Jesus spent His whole time of ministry showing what His Kingdom is like.

When Jesus' disciples asked Him how to pray. He told them to pray "your Kingdom come"

It's a mystery. But when we pray for the sick we can pray for His Kingdom to come, an "already, not yet Kingdom" that will someday come in its fullness. I'm finally ok, asking "with faith" for healing without understanding it. If God doesn't heal, it’s not "out of His will" its just that His Kingdom hasn't come in it's fullness yet. As a follower of Jesus, I am dedicated to living as if the Kingdom of God is a present reality.

Anyone else have thoughts on the mystery of Jesus Kingdom?